Observing German(s)…

Neither irritated nor annoyed at Germany’s accusations of “playing for time” or its calls for “measures to restore lost trust” and give a “constructive answer” to the International Atomic Energy Agency’s demands that Iran halt uranium enrichment and provide missing information, the crafty Iranian diplomat feigned consternation (just like the German one does), although not very well, thus causing subdued giggles and smirks among the rest of the Iranian delegation, and then suggested that the two countries meet as soon as possible to discuss the matter once again.

“Our offer is serious,” Mottaki said, not very seriously. “Seriously,” he insisted.

„Ich denke nicht, dass Sanktionen eine Lösung sind.“

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Selbstverständlich.

The CDU politicians have demanded that Schroeder’s invitation be withdrawn. They find it strange that Moscow’s chief Gazprom mafia, I mean corporation lobbyist should be explaining to Germans how to best formulate their energy policies, although he does speak perfect German, albeit with a slight Russian accent now. Some of these suspicious politicians even suspect what Schroeder could be trapped in what used to be called “decent folks” used to call “a conflict of interest.”

As for Schroeder, he can absolutely no way no how understand how anyone could ever possibly get the idea that he would ever represent Moscow’s interests favorably, just because he’s being paid by a sinister Russian gas monopoly to do so, I mean. The next thing you know they’ll be calling him a useful idiot. They hurt his feelings, in other words. And I, for one, think that everybody should apologize and be friends again. And then withdraw the invitation.

Lobbyist: A person who attempts to persuade (to lobby) politicians to vote in a certain way.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Selbstverständlich.

Today’s post is brought to you by Blogger News Network. 

“The Germans have no idea how someone like Obama can rise within a short period of time…”

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Selbstverständlich.

Today’s post is brought to you by Blogger News Network.

Ich nehme die Wahl an or whatever.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Klaro.

“We are shocked and dismayed,” said the shocked and dismayed left-wing German parliamentarians in a chore although nobody asked them. “Nobody told us that there was actually a friggin’ Krieg going on down there. As you know, the German army is prohibited by law to ever take part in warlike activities of any kind with or in other countries, much less or including our own, and we don’t even want to talk about some awful place like Afghanistan, otherwise we would have never agreed to such an irresponsible and foolhardy military adventure.”

And as if to add insult to injury, a recent shooting “incident” at a German checkpoint in Afghanistan, analog to the “atrocities” committed at American checkpoints here and elsewhere, only on a more regular basis, has left practically no one in Germany particularly concerned much about it at all.

And in typical German fashion, being that there can never be any “losers” in anything, particularly or especially in “a war”, this unpleasant misunderstanding has been discreetly cleared up and rectified, sort of, and more importantly, without the uncaring German public having seen, heard or read a word about it anywhere, much less here.

The concerned parliamentarians were at least pleased to hear this, and that this humanitarian payment made to the victims’ families was “no admission of guilt”, as the guy making the payment guiltily pointed out to them. But this doesn’t change the fact that there is still “a war” going on down there people and they, concerned as they are, are going to make damned sure that they do absolutely nothing about it right now.

Krieg ist voll der Stress, Alter.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Logisch.

I know what they’re thinking (here is where the calculators get pulled out and the German logical conclusion gets computed), we’ll do absolutely nothing at all. And then this all will go away like usual, all by itself, eventually. And then we’ll go on vacation again.

Annoyed by the annoyance of it all, and wishfully thinking away the ugly little truth on a daily basis now, Germans everywhere are getting impatient and beginning to show signs of reality fatigue and advanced Georgian wake-up call stress disorder as Russia, strongly opposed to the further eastward expansion of the NATO alliance, once again begins its routine expansion toward the west.

This is, however, an unpleasant thought and therefore undenkbar (unthinkable) here. And this being the case, the only other action left open to the Germans is continued further understanding for Russian “anxieties” and the passing of blame for this awful mess on United States policies like open support for Georgia and the anti-Iranian anti-missile shield planned for Poland and the Czech Republic (two countries strangely less concerned about Russian anxieties).

This doesn’t do anything to stop German anxiety, of course (there is no known cure for German anxiety), but doctors here do reccomend that doing what you know does create a certain air of familiarity which is conducive to ameliorating that annoying schizophrenic state.

Sag mir wann ich meinen Kopf wieder aus dem Sand ziehen kann.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Her damit!

That really does give me pause to worry about Russia’s point man, you know. If he (or is it they?) is so tough and all and such a judo powerhouse and can walk around with his shirt off in public all the time and eat Siberian tigers for lunch and all that, well how is it that such a wussy like our near-ex-President poses such a threat for him? 

I’ll tell you why. What this survey really means is that the United States is behind everything that has gone wrong in Georgia. Again, I mean. But you knew that already, I assume. The aggressor is just trying to defend himself, as usual. You know, like Hitler defended himself against Poland? No, sorry, bad example (here’s where you bring up the US invasion of Iraq). You know what I mean, though, I think. Well if you’re a European intellectual type you do.

Maybe Putin really is “punching above his weight”, as they say. Damn. What a jerk. He and his buddies ought to go out there and pick on somebody more their own size. Oh, wait a minute, they just did.

Wir wollen ja die Russen nicht provozieren.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Klar.

The televised request, issued during a Russian news circus performance held in Moscow over the weekend, caught many Russia-understanding Germans off-guard, Steinmeier included. “Why, I don’t understand. Quickly giving in under pressure that isn’t even there yet has always worked well for us in the past,” a perturbed Steinmeier is reported to have told his perturbed staff. “What does this guy expect us to do anyway, play hard to get or something? Why, I’ve got more important stuff to do than waste my time with this Georgia crap all day.”

But Kremlin sources believe that Putin’s concerns are more of a stylistic nature. “It just doesn’t look good, I mean convincing,” the monotone Medvedew went on to say. “Nobody with any common sense out there believes that we could ever get away with this invasion and these new puppet states of ours (South Ossetia and Abkhazia) if the international community would just stand up and say no with one voice, and mean it.”

I mean, it’s not like we’re ten feet tall or anything Frank,” the awkwardly stiff Russian President said while being shoved offstage. “Even I can
see that, and I am made entirely of wood.”

Die Russen sind halt aus einem anderen Holz geschnitten.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Logisch.

That the bloodthirsty (in Iraq they’re called oil-thirsty) American occupiers surrounding them are well-versed and specially trained to commit such atrocities and even revel in making “mistakes” like these, that’s understood of course. At least in Germany it is. But that peacekeeping Germans could pull something like this off, too?

Well, to be honest, upon rereading the German article I found on this
(and there were surprisingly very few of them), it does appear as if this
incident maybe wasn’t quite as tragic as it first seemed to be (for the
Germans, I mean). The title went out of its way to make clear that the
three civilians were “killed by German weapons.” I guess that means
that German Germans themselves weren’t directly involved
in the matter.

Willkommen in the real world.

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Logisch.

Today’s post is brought to you by Blogger News Network.

“Es bleibt uns gar nichts anderes übrig.”

Kommentare auf Deutsch? Selbstverständlich.