Germany quickly running out of potential hostages in Iraq
German Foreign Minister Steinmeier has called together the next crises staff. Berlin is abuzz. Word is out that it’s going to be very tight over the next few weeks.
After the latest kidnapping of two native engineers in Iraq yesterday, it is becoming more and more probable that there may soon be no more potential German hostages left to kidnap in Iraq at all.
“There are only about 100 Germans left down there,” reported an unnamed source near the government (he lives in Kreuzberg). “So like, what happens when they’re all gone? I mean, they’ve budgeted for this and all haven’t they? Like, who gets the money then?”
Steinmeier is reportedly really, really upset this time as everybody in the world now knows that the German government cheerfully pays any amount deemed necessary by kidnappers to obtain the release of any German hostage anywhere and he is in a quandary and has even been seen pacing around in circles in his stylish office wondering out loud why on earth these German nationals keep getting kidnapped like this all the time by these awful people for goodness sakes gosh almighty.
Some now speculate that should the number of potential German hostages in Iraq reach 10 or less, plans are on the table for the German government to immediately begin with the payment of ransom for the release of other kidnapped nationalities, as well.
Wir müssen konsequent bleiben.
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Eigentlich sollte man an alle verbliebenen Deutschen dort eine Verfügung zustellen mit der unmissverständlichen Aufforderung das Land unverzüglich zu verlassen (nötigenfalls die Reisekosten auszulegen) - und für den Fall der Missachtung jede weitere staatliche Unterstützung ausschließen.
Wer dann immer noch dort bleiben wollte, der/die hätte es nicht besser verdient als mit örtlichen Kidnappern auf Safari zu gehen ! (Comment this)